About Me
My Story
People always ask, “Hazel, how on earth did you get started in all this?"
From the age of nine, I battled with an eating disorder, along the way I developed an addiction to alcohol and I was crippled by the belief that I was worthless. I became so consumed with keeping up the “look good” so no one would see that I was crumbling on the inside. After drinking for 17 years, I woke up one morning when my babies were little and took myself to an AA meeting and put the same effort I put into drinking (which was a lot!) into getting sober and changed everything.
I went back to school to become a substance use disorder counselor (SUDC) and felt good about channeling my pain into purpose. But eight years into recovery I felt more broken and lost than ever, because I still allowed others to define my value and I sought outside validation like my life depended on it. If I could just look perfect, seem perfect or die trying to be perfect maybe I would be happy.
I have a feeling you’re here because you have felt the same way.
I experienced what I now call “the dark night of the soul” that actually happened in the middle of the day in front of a bunch of people at a training workshop where I was learning about experiential therapy when out of nowhere all of the pain I thought I had worked through but actually just suppressed bubbled up to the surface and just spilled out… all over in front of everyone…with a lot of ugly crying and maybe laying on the floor with everyone looking on (it was BAD!). But as I lay there breaking open, I heard the voice of my wisest, highest self and she said, “The only way out of the pain is through it and this is how you’ll finally find peace.”
Through experiential therapy I poured myself into exploring all the limiting beliefs and core wounds that had run my life. I was confronted with letting go of the belief that if I could just be “perfect” then I would be worthy. It was painful, gut wrenching work but it was from there that healing was born. I learned that pain can either be something we run away from–and we can run away in a lot of different ways–substances, diet coke, netflix, shopping, working out too much, over eating, not eating, numbing out on social media, working too much or losing yourself so completely in the roles you play that you don’t have time or energy to deal with the actual issues–or it can be our biggest teacher and guide. It can point us in the direction of growth.
I am grateful for that moment of ugly crying on the floor because it led me to where I am today. I help women who feel caught up in the “look good” but feel empty, overwhelmed, distracted and disconnected with their authentic selves.
As your guide, I will show you how to do the work of disrupting negative patterns and beliefs so you can rewrite your story and finally embrace the truth that your worth isn’t determined by how much you do, what others think about you or how you look–worth just is…it’s eternal, unchanging and not something to be earned or lost.
I currently host and sit on the board for Arena Talks, a monthly recovery speaking event and continue as part of the clinical team for I Am Recovery.
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